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| Saturday, 19-Mar-2005 00:00 |
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~a journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step~
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..there's no thrill..
in easy sailing
when the skies are clear and blue
there's no joy ..
in merely doing things
which anyone can do
but there's some satisfaction
that is mighty sweet to take
when you reach a destination
you thought you'd never make!! ..
* my favourite quote since school..tp tak ingat dah saper yg cakap 
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| Thursday, 17-Mar-2005 00:00 |
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..sedingin salju...
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Kemaafan Dendam Yang Terindah
Kehangatan mentari ku rasakan
Tak sehangat api perbalahan
Ku ketuk pintu hati
Senyap dan sunyi
Tiada jawapan yang ku perolehi
Dinginnya malam itu bagai salju
Tidak sedingin perasaan mu
Kau sengaja membina dinding pemisah
Di antara kita tak lagi bersemuka
Kekasih ku
Ku rasakan perlu
Menitip surat buat tatapan mu
Sekali ini aku rela merendah beralah
Agar perhubungan terjalin semula
Kekasih ku
Tak mungkin ku tahu
Apa tersirat di hati kecil mu
Andainya aku yang bersalah maaf kan saja
Kemaafan dendam yang terindah
Kehangatan mentari dingin salju
Bertukar ganti hari ke hari
Aku masih di sini sabar menanti
Terbuka kembali hati mu yang terkunci
Kekasih ku
Ku rasakan perlu
Menitip surat buat tatapan mu
Sekali ini aku rela merendah diri beralah
Agar perhubungan terjalin semula
Kekasih ku
Tak mungkin ku tahu
Apa tersirat di hati kecil mu
Andainya aku yang bersalah Maafkan saja
Kemaafan.. kemaafan dendam yang terindah
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| Wednesday, 16-Mar-2005 00:00 |
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..alkisah di suatu hari..
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hmm.. ari ni rasa nak tulis something sbbnya rasa bersalah kat sumer org.. 
Yesterday afternoon, I got a call from the transplant coordinator, asking if I want to tag along for an organ retrieval in Barnsley. I wasn't sure at first since I was the only student they can bring at the moment. After a phone call 'consultation' wif farid, I decided to come along. It was 530pm, and I needed to be in St JAmes' Hospital by 715pm.
So i took a cab, got to St James' around 7. We were taken by the ambulance.. (heheh I was really excited..first time naik ambulance tu  ) arrived Barnsley about 8pm.
There were 6 of us, Mr White & Mr Finch(the surgeon), SEan(the coordinator), Tony (staffnurse), Mike(driver) and myself. The surgery didn't start till 9pm tho, since we have to wait for the Kidney-pancreas team from Manchester(I think). It was worth the effort, since I learnt quite a lot of things esp from the Pancreas team surgeon, Andrew. (Although they kept asking why I wanted to come, and 1 of them told me I should go n get a life, find another job..hahha ).
The surgery didn't finished till about 230am. I was enthusiastic at first, but then, it was too long and I was already too tired from standing and sitting( kerusi dia takde backrest), so by the time they cleaned the organ, I was too tired to care. 
I was in the OT theater most of the time, and i turned off my phone (the reception wasn't that good anyway). I didn't think that I'd make somebody worry about me (as he couldn't reach me till about 1am). I thought I told him that I'll be late..but probably I didn't.. that in turn make everyone else worry, so when i finally turned on my phone I've got quite a lot of text messages and voice messages. 
rasa bersalah sangat2 kat sumer orang..tak tau laa bleh jadik cenggitu skali..iskk
Sori yer kawan-kawan 
I got home about 4am in the morning - luckily Mike dropped me off, so jimat duit tambang teksi
*wish I had my camera wif me..bleh mintak amik gamba *
Kepada kawan2 saya yg bersusah payah mencari saya malam tadi..mintak maaf banyak2..and thanks for caring..sesungguhnya saya tak bermaksud menyusahkan ati sumer orang. pasni tak buat dah
| Quote: | make new friends
but keep the old
for one is silver
the other is gold |
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| Monday, 14-Mar-2005 00:00 |
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Islamic Medical Symposium 2005
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As promised, here are some pictures during the symposium. Mostly are pictures with my friends..nak amik gamba the speakers but then my camera takde zoom, and I didn't sit in the front, so tak bleh laa na amik gamba.
Muslim & Medicine in a Globalised World, this symposium was organised by IMAM (Islamic Medical Association, Malaysia) UK-EIRE aimed for Malaysian Muslim students and doctors in the UK and Ireland. It was held in Postgraduate Centre, Manchester Royal Infirmary on 12 and 13 March 2005. This is the first time that I've ever attended a programme like this, and I personally think it was really great. Full of information - although my brain was already overload by the end of the 2nd day but it was well worth the money and the effort
My conclusion:
1. Everyone of us, as Muslim hold the responsibilities to do 'da'wah', starting from ourselves,our family, friends and those people around us.
2. nothing u do is too small to Allah
3. As Muslim doctors, we should go back to Al-Quran and Sunnah and try to bring back the 'zaman kegemilangan islam' - Ibn Sina, Ar-razi - just to name a few Muslim great doctors who were also Muslim scholars. Every scientific findings were already stated in the Quran - from the start of the human reproduction process, finger prints, and many others. There are verses in the Quran explaining these. ( I just knew that Keith Moore- the famous anatomy textbook writer has reverted to Islam when he learned about human creation in the Quran- he even wrote Quran as one of his source of reference.) I
4. we should never separate medicine from Islam, it should always intergrated and interlinked with each other. In fact we should never separate anything from Islam.
Ada banyak lagi, tapi tak larat nak tulis
And this section is specially for medical students in the UK/Ireland
Untuk mereka yang mahu bekerja di UK:
After August 2005, they will change the system to Foundation Programme:
* FY 1&2 --> STY 1 ( u do ur MRCP/MRCS - u can repeat once if u failed, otherwise u might need to find another speciality) --> STY 2 (6/7 years training) --> post certificate of complete training specialisation(maknanya da bleh jadi specialist) --> pastu bleh laa subspecialised kalau mahu
(FY=Foundation yr, STY = specialist training yr)
Advantages : gaji banyak (pakcik kayo); less time needed to be a specialist ( dlm masa 10 thn, da leh jadi consultant dah); automatically registered with the GMC(General Medical Council) - so it'd be easier if you want to further studies outside Malaysia; less working hours - more time for urself n family; tak pe kalau tak dpt cuti raya - mmg tak penah ada pun cuti raya dlm kalendar UK.
disadvantages : jauh dari kampung halaman - kesian mak ayah yg tunggu anak2 dia jadik doktor kat kampung; program ni baru jer nak start, so the outcome
tak tau lagi - kiranya the first few batches will just be the guinea pig; and then u need to decide which speciality u'd want to do from very early stage. Lagi satu, the MRCP/MRCS results will be ranked, so, eventhough you get a very good marks, if there are people yg get better marks than you, you may not be able to get into the speciality that you want - if you failed; you need to find another speciality.
Untuk mereka yg mahu pulang berkhidmat di tanah air tercinta
housemanship (1 year +6mths under supervision) --> 2yrs MO (bleh jadi training lecturer-increase chances to get into Master Programme earlier) --> master programme (4yrs) --> clinical specialist --> jr consultant--> consultant. (ni aku kira2 kalu belaja bersungguh2 ko bleh jadik consultant just before u reach 40)
Adv: Tak yah susahkan JPA nak carik korang balik;JPA pun takdele anta surat kat penjamin2 suruh baya hutang-->tak buat mak ayah susah hati; kalau nak jadik surgeon-higher chances to get into the master programme(but then, u might want to consider doing MRCS in the UK-registered with GMC, before going back home); more hands-on experiences; banyak patients; there'll be patients that come in with later stages of disease- so u'll get more experience compared to those who trained in the UK.
Disadv: tak kaya- gaji kat mesia tak banyak cam kat UK (unless kalau da jadik specialist, then bleh jadik kaya; 4 years is too long just to become a highly qualified physician-waste of time; sedih woo kalu tak bleh balik raya..orang lain sumer bleh balik raya kat kampung; housemanship=robot - working hours yg panjang, esp if u do ur housemanship in main hospitals ( but then, this is where the experiences come from - so that u'll have better judgement when u become an MO)
Tu je laa kot..this is a highly informative entry, specially dedicated tu medical students in the UK and Ireland who didn't get the chance to attend the symposium.
Pesanan penaja - hujan emas di negeri orang hujan batu di negeri sendiri, baik lagi di negeri sendiri..walaupun gaji doktor kat mesia cuma 1/7 drpd gaji doktor kat UK ( ye laa kata pun £1= RM 7) sesungguhnya orang2 kat mesia tu, pakcik2 makcik2, atuk-nenek sumer menunggu kepulangan orang2 yg di perantauan..hehehehe (cam poyo jer) 
*the pictures weren't very nice since some of it were taken during the talk- so tokleh guna flash and the lighting was very romantic jugakl *
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| Sunday, 13-Mar-2005 00:00 |
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*updates*
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hmm da baper hari tak update..agak busy minggu ni.. i just come back from a medical symposium in manchester, entitled : Muslim and Medicine in a Globalised World. Very interesting symposium, and certainly an eye-opener for me, who's still struggling as a medical student, and uncertain of the future.
To come back, or not to? Medicine or surgery? Which specialities? A training lecturer?? So many questions that need to be answered..(yg pastinya, semua sesi ceramah tu memanggil-manggil doktor2 di bumi UK & Ireland ni utk pulang ke tanah air )
I'll write more next time..right now.. I'm just too tired..and my brain's overload. It's still early but i need some rest..till then, adios amigos!!
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| Tuesday, 8-Mar-2005 00:00 |
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SEnjA NaN MEraH
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Masihkah kita termangu di bawah pepohon itu
Ketika hujan melunturi danau yang terusang
Tidak pernah dibilang hari
Hanyalah debar yang terasa... terasa
Setiap hari dibuai mimpi yang terindah
Dengan menghitung senja merah dihujung sinar
Mencipta keheningan rahsia
Pada sehimpun kenangan
Menyimpul satu makna diruang yang lurus ini
Haruskah kita mencari pada gunung dan lurah
Liku-liku curam insani
Haruskah kita mencari puncak mengilau cahaya
Dalam hidup seribu warna
Dibawah teriring ungkapan pada sebuah wajah
Yang lara kesepian
Haruskah kita mencari dalam senja begini
Kembali kita bertemu
Haruskah kita mencari dalam simpati wangi
Membilang kenangan yang abadi
Seperti menuggu mentari senja
Menghilang perlahan-lahan disebalik
Awan yang merah
Dibalik awan yang merah
Dibalik awan yang merah
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| Sunday, 6-Mar-2005 00:00 |
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~bapaku pulang dari kota..bapaku beli kan kereta~
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Ini lagi gamba2 masa gi Europe thn lepas..lama dah tu, tapi sbb byk sgt gamba jd cam malas nak upload.. anyway..gambar lamborghini tu kat Rome..gamba Ferrari tu plak kat MOnte Carlo 
nak tunggu bli sendri..tak tau bila kan..posing kat keta org pun jadik ler
The Mayonnaise Jar and Coffee!~
When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar....and the coffee....!~
A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.
The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.
The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous "yes".
The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.
"Now" said the professor, as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognise that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things - your family, your children, your health, your friends and your favourite passions - things that if everything else was lost andonly they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car. The sand is everything else - the small stuff. If you put the sand into the jar first,"
he continued ...
"There is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out to diner. Play another 18. there will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first, the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."
One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented. And, the professor smiled.
"I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend."
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| Saturday, 5-Mar-2005 00:00 |
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..be mine ;)..
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I had a session with simulated patient yesterday, trying to explain the procedure of laparascopic cholecystectomy.. I was caught off guard when Mr Greenwood(the patient) ask me whether they will take his teeth out.. I was a bit confused about the relevance of his teeth wif his gallbladder(pundi hempedu) removal. Then he said he'd be embarrased if people see him without teeth..only then i understood what he meant.. .. rupa2nya dia nak tahu kalau2 dia kna bukak gigi palsu dia masa operation tu. Aduh!! rasa nak gelak pun ada..tapi tak sopan laa plak kan..so, dengan tak sure nye..aku pun jawab tak tahu..nanti kutanya doktor bertugas..iskk..sampai sekarang still rasa nak gelak..sbb aku mmg tak tersangka laa kepentingan fakta2 remeh camtu. Ingatkan dia nak tanya details of the procedure ke, apa ke..rupanya anxious pasal gigi palsu..iskk nasib baik laa dia tu berlakon aje, bukan patient btul..kalu tak maunya aku kna komplen sbb gelakkan patient
Pastu later that afternoon I went to town wif Farid, since she needed to buy some stuff n my watch needed a new battery..
So..inilah hasilnya berjalan di town pada hari ini.. 2 pasang selipar Be Mine, segalas beg yg baru, 1 bedak dan satu eyeliner..amik gamba selipar je..sbb selipar sgt chumil
*gambar ihsan drpd farid*
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| Friday, 4-Mar-2005 00:00 |
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~once in a blue moon~
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hehehe..kelmarin..tade keja nak buat (byk sebenanya, tp malas)..tetiba rasa rajin..teringat ada orang na gi interview dgn Petronas ahad ni..pastu ingat kna pos tie jugak utk org tu..so, buat laa kad good luck skali utk dia..maklumler na bli ta sempat
so..ini laa hasil kerja tangan saya pada hari itu 
| Quote: | Dua insan - M Nasir + CT
Bila kau senyum ku gembira
bila kau sedih ku menangis
bagai taman rindukan kumbang
kurindu padamu oh sayang
dimana saja kau berada
kukan tetap bersamamu
walaupun jasadku jauh
namun hatiku dekat selalu
bila kini halangan menimpa
kerna cinta ada ku tetap setia
hanya dikau dan asmara
membuat hidupku bagai dalam syurga
dua insan sedang bercinta
dua insan berjanji setia
telah ku katakan padamu oh sayang
hanya kuasa tuhan
dapat memisahkan
bila kau tanya pada rembulan
mengapa cahya berseri-seri
nanti jawabnya kepadamu
kerna dikau cinta padaku
kupersembahkan kepadamu
sekuntum bunga mawar merah
kau terima sambil tersenyum
kembang yang harum kau cium
bila kini halangan menimpa
kerna cinta ada ku tetap setia
hanya dikau dan asmara
membuat hidupku bagai dalam syurga
biar masa berganti masa
biarpun musim berubah
telah kukatakan padamu oh sayang
hanya kuasa tuhan dapat memisahkan
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isk..tetiba rasa cam jiwang plaks
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| Wednesday, 2-Mar-2005 00:00 |
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¬snowy leeds¬
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snow in March??? unbeliavable  ..tapi siapalah kita..like my mom said 'bukan kuasa kita nak tentukan cuaca,redha je lah dgn ketentuanNya'
I thought the cold weather in England will improve at least a tiny bit this week..proved me wrong this morning, when Samina text me telling she's not going to the ward because of the heavy snow.. so i take a look from the window..and yes, it's snowing.
I haven't got any pics of snow this year..so i took out my camera..took a few shots, then went back to sleep..(takut tak sempat ) -- btul pun..by the time i woke up, most of it had melted away..
It was snowing quite heavily last week, but the snow didn't settle..it just melted as soon as it touched the ground.. Really hope the cold + gloomy days will go away..and soon!! I'm tired of having to wear coats to classes 
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arghh ... begitukah ceritanye!~ tensi tensi .... mueheheheh ... anyways, glad that u're safe and sound back in 55 Kendal Lane .... 
Handphone ... wut a wonderful technology ey?!~ 
